I was supposed to head into Seattle this morning on the 6:40AM ferry for an appointment. When I went to bed last night I knew we were under a winter storm watch, but since it was the third such warning this year and neither of the others had proven to be accurate, I still set my alarm for 4:27AM. However at 4AM I was awakened when my generator kicked in, causing the outside yard lights to activate enough for me to realize that there was some major snow outside.
I looked at the tweets on my phone and discovered that snow had hit Seattle as well as Vashon, and that while the Vashon schools only had a late start notice (later to be changed to closed), the Seattle schools were already closed. I lay in my bed, under my warm quilt, and pondered my choices. The decision should have been easy. The appointment wasn’t urgent and certainly not worth risking life and limb for it. Seattle rush hour traffic is not easy even with the best of conditions. A friend had offered to take me with his truck, and said I could call him even at the last minute, but I knew it would be a miserable trip.
Why did I even hesitate, you’re probably asking yourself. The decision was obvious. Reschedule. But I’d been brought up under a strict code which allowed for no “wimping out,” as far as meeting obligations and moving forward. Part of me said that I have a good car and I am a good driver and I just needed to get over my fears and do it. Thankfully, the saner part of my brain prevailed and I rolled over and dozed until a more reasonable hour. By 7AM not only had the generator kicked in yet again, but it was staying on (and is still on, thank you, you wonderful generator, over four hours later!), and I found out that The University of Washington was officially closed. In addition, the Vashon schools were closed as well. Now I knew my decision, which I was still stewing over, had been correct. Then the office where I was supposed to appear at 8:30 called at 7:45 to say that they were closed because of the snow. I got rescheduled for tomorrow afternoon. Had I forced myself to drive in the hazardous situation, I would have arrived only to find out that my appointment had been cancelled.
So, instead, I shoveled my walkway out to the gate, measured the snowfall (4.5″ at that time), and now I’m happily enjoying my unexpected snow day with no appointment and no students. I showered in the snow (for those who may not know or remember I have an outdoor shower), which was delightful in spite of having my loud generator on the other side of the low fence of my shower. I’m now watching enormous snowflakes fall all around my nice cozy warm home (thank you again, generator!). And I’ve vowed to be easier on myself and to give myself permission to say no when that’s the right answer, without feeling that somehow I’ve wimped out.